Mrs MDS does Bath Spa

Whilst one never does the third person, it was looking to be a long Easter weekend of Noel Coward proportions and somehow the alter ego seemed more fitting than the reality. As the cast warmed up at the Theatre Royal Bath for Coward's 1939 play Present Laughter, it was a thrilled to be on her own Mrs MDS who rocked up at the Thermae Bath Spa for an afternoon of languishing.

The moment Mrs MDS set foot over the automatic door, the shoulders relaxed and the debit card was whipped out pronto to pay for 2 hours in the spa with 'rented' towel, slippers and a robe. (Please note Mrs MDS payed for this all out of her hard earned money and can testify that £33 will be debited from her account for her indulgence, in addition she refrained from mentioning her global blogging status and took no bribes from the staff.)

It truly was a real West Country greeting in respect of accent but somewhat perfunctory in delivery and hardly gushing. Mrs MDS could have done with a bit more special interaction after all she was a visitor to the city and therefore that well worn phase delivered to all children before a school trip 'you are an ambassador for your school' perhaps could have formed part of the spa's morning mantra to its employees.

The changing rooms are practical and therefore you have to be pretty organised to navigate successfully the narrowness of cubicle and locker area plus keep all your things in order. Mrs MDS was extremely grateful she hadn't started on the Easter Eggs (or the drink she was driven to over the ensuing days to keep a semblance of a smile on her face whilst erasing her brain cells to prevent thought.) The requisite blue band would have been dispensed with in the first scene of a Coward play due to its displeasing function and form, but it was a required to be worn at all times and not be lost item - so why was it so impossible to keep on ones wrists. Mrs MDS has quite slim ones.

She can heartily recommend 2 hours by oneself in the Thermae Spa. It is incredible how the time flies even when one is on ones own. The relaxation sets in almost immediately one puts on the towelling slippers. Perhaps they send a trigger to the brain. Even Mrs MDS was so relaxed that canoodling couples were spared the usual 'get yourself a room' utterance delivered on a daily basis at Waterloo station to a variety of face sucking couples. It is not that Mrs MDS is a prude but that she has always kept her Mediterranean style youthful lustfulness well for the Mediterranean. More specifically for quiet and secret coves on the Adriatic or the Aegean sea. Granted the Roman Baths may have once had the spectacle of orgies if BBC 2 Caligula was anything to go by but public spas need to have standards and Mrs MDS thinks a no petting rule should be installed immediately. Along with a no chewing gum one too.

The Minerva pool, the roof top pool and the Aroma steam rooms with waterfall shower were a delightful way to spend a chilly April afternoon. The warmth of the steam room was utter bliss and the fresh air whilst swimming around in the roof top pool was wonderful. Not that one can really swim with the rest of the public lounging or canoodling.



If one was planning a weekend in Bath then the spa is a fabulous place to visit. Mrs MDS would have liked a little more luxury and therefore would recommend a treatment, although obviously cannot stipulate what these are like but can only imagine a Full Body Polish would have been worth the £38

Upon leaving the Spa Mr MDS suggested Mrs MDS walked to be met but the whole experience had rendered the use of limbs and sense of direction to incapable and impossible. Nothing short of a pick up would satisfy and the appearence of a sweet smiling little petit garcon in the back seat put paid to any canoodling, imaginary or real.